At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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