Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(650): View more from California

dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning

(805): View more from California

1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy

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(619): View more from California

He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.

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(616): View more from Michigan

whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?

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25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Read it at the TFLN blog
(651): View more from Minnesota

How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?

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(330): View more from Ohio

So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...

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(248): View more from Michigan

Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.

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(407): View more from Florida

I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat

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