You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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