i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
