The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
