Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
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