The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
