Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
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