Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize