Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
