I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
