Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
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