Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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