Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made out with two different species that night
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
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