Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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