someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize