just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Randomize
