return my video game
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
two words: eviction party
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
