i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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