it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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