i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
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