Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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