I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
