Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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