Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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