I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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