Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
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