It's like God shit irony all over that family
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
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Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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