operation have a gay friend backfired
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
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and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
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We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
My liver is preforming stress tests.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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