Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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