i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'm sobbing to NWA
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
