im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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