Well apparently he's into motor boating.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
