So drunk its hurt
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
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You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
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What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I deserve this hangover.
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