Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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