talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I deserve to be covered in dicks
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
