I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
