kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize
