Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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