did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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