she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
