I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize