Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
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