If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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