How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
nutella sex= disaster
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
