they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
