Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
no. you can't hotbox the world.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
