Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(510): View more from California

turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks

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(760): View more from California

And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"

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(905): View more from Ontario

It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order

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(703): View more from Virginia

Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is

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(507): View more from Minnesota

he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I can feel your judgement through the phone

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(503): View more from Oregon

I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.

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