Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Let the clothes fall where they may.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize