thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
